The Latest

Oct 20, 2014 / 128,270 notes

(via humoric)

Oct 20, 2014 / 249,017 notes

Actual Quotes from my Dad (An English Teacher)

  • Dad: Why the hell did you put a comma there?
  • Dad: Do you even know what a participial phrase is?
  • Dad: Omg. He's like my favorite character of all time.
  • Dad: Who should I dress up as for the movie premier?
  • Dad: Hey are you awake? I know it's late, but you read Animal Farm, right? Yeah. I need you to read this report. I can't tell if I am just super tired or if this is actual bullshit.
  • Dad: Alesha wouldn't be able to spell 'definitely' right if wrote it down for her. She would fucking erase it and then write 'defiantly', because she doesn't care. I hate her.
  • Dad: I need you to bake brownies. I lost a bet.
  • Dad: Omg. You cannot ship me with Gilcher. You know I don't like tattoos and he's like twenty-five. And for Christ's sake, he teaches math.
  • Dad: Omg. Gilcher said the funniest thing today.
  • Dad: Mrs. Ashworth and I have decided to start a band. It'll be called Great Expectations.
  • Dad: It's like you didn't read the fucking book.
  • Dad: Okay. So this week you're reading this book I stole from Mrs. Ashworth's. It's like sixty pages long, but you'll love it.
  • Dad: *puts books on my bed for me to read everyday and demands that I read them*
  • Dad: My son doesn't like reading. I have not only failed him, but society. You aren't my son. Leave.
  • Dad: Okay. So you're getting books for Christmas. All of you. I get discounts on them since I'm a teacher, and since I'm a teacher, it's all I can afford, so...
  • Dad: Fucking standardized testing can go fuck itself in the ass.
  • Dad: I have to teach for the required testing instead of what they really need to know.
  • Dad: Fuck the government.
  • Dad: Fuck the school board.
  • Dad: Close the door.
  • Dad: Charles Dickens was so fucking pretentious, and I hate him, but he also caused change, but he's such a Dick. Ha. DICKens.
  • Dad: I love puns.
  • Dad: People who say sarcasm is the lowest form of humor are assholes.
  • Dad: Please shut up.
  • Dad: Catching Fire was the worst book but the best movie and that feels weird.
  • Dad: I wouldn't get so mad when you call me at school if you didn't change your ringtones to inappropriate rap music.
  • Dad: I fucking hate Alesha. She asked what countries were apart of Austria-Hungary today and I almost told her to get out.
  • Dad: You cannot visit my school in a dress that short. There are boys there.
  • Dad: Barbra Parks is fucking Queen.
  • Dad: I need you to make me a good, relaxing playlist for silent reading. I'm too lazy.
  • Dad: If I have to watch two of my students grind on each other at one more dance, I will kill them both.
  • Dad: They act like I care what they think.
  • Dad: I hate homework.
  • Dad: I have decided to become a politician.
  • Dad: What's the one book with the guys and the one kills the other and the chick without a name who dies and the short angry man? Mouseman? Oh my fucking gosh. Of Mice and Men. I have failed.
Oct 20, 2014 / 42,113 notes

(via garyhiggins)

Oct 20, 2014 / 531,065 notes


meeting someone with the same music taste is seriously the best thing ever

(via stability)

Oct 20, 2014 / 331,552 notes
Oct 20, 2014 / 684,894 notes

(via vizya)

Oct 20, 2014 / 29,094 notes



(via pmon3y69)

Oct 20, 2014 / 112,395 notes


when they mess up your order but end up giving you extra food for free


(via acomas)

Oct 20, 2014 / 312,205 notes


I love them

they’re wondering what he’s looking for

(via the-absolute-funniest-posts)

Oct 20, 2014 / 706,142 notes

(via joshr-ss)

Oct 20, 2014 / 115,721 notes

(via co-ver)

Oct 20, 2014 / 36,781 notes


i wanna hug someone and roll around w them in my bed and bury my face in their chest and smell them and jus feel their arms around me

(via m-cmxc-v)

Oct 20, 2014 / 686,178 notes

Reblog if you’ve ever yelled at a book.






Are there people who don’t reblog this?

I can only assume that the ones who haven’t aren’t reading the right books.


If it doesn’t make you mad, it’s not good enough.


(via delicate-s0uls)

Oct 20, 2014 / 4,320 notes



*When you finally decided to say fuck school*


(via asvprock)

Oct 20, 2014 / 274,178 notes


im tired of school i wanna quit but its for my future. tough life.

(via asvprock)